If we were having coffee right now I would tell you that although I love the taste of cream and half-and-half, and could probably drink a quart of each, I actually like CoffeeMate in my coffee better because it displaces the coffee rather than dilutes it, making it taste richer. I know it’s like eating a small tub of Crisco every day, but I don’t care.
If we were having coffee right now I would tell you that I think saying “let’s have coffee together” sounds way too clean-cut and cute-sy for me, like Mrs. Cleaver offering the Beaver and the boys some cookies and milk or an old International Coffee commercial. There’s something benign and childish about it, despite coffee being considered a grown-up drink. And it’s certainly not the kind of line I’d want to use if I needed to tell you something really intense or personal or important. Let’s just say we’re having a drink right now or we’re getting togetherright now, shall we?
If we were having coffee right now I would tell you that I feel I should be doing something else. Something Important. Something that makes me feel more productive than just hanging out and talking about shit. And I would tell you my feeling that just hanging out is wasting time is part of my obsessive nature that keeps me from enjoying life as much as I could.
If were were having coffee right now I would tell you I buy Kirkland dark roast coffee for $9.99 for three pounds and no longer waste my money on the more expensive stuff because I think the Kirkland coffee tastes just as good. I would not tell you that I’m terrified of running out of money and being homeless and having to beg family members for money despite having worked since I could walk and leaving home at 17 and putting myself through six years of college and making a very good living at something I loved for 30 years because before he killed himself my dad would flood my young brain over and over with “I’m leaving the family a lot of money but your mom will shit it away in a few years so you need to make your own money and don’t let anyone take it.”
If we were having coffee right now I would tell you that the cloud-laden sunsets in the desert have been beyond spectacular this monsoon season and I know I’m so lucky to live here and see such beauty but I keep having to remind myself to be happy and I wonder if you do, too?